Before I continue on yesterday's post, I would like to say something. Beeyan dahling, thank you ah!! After I saw your beautiful pictures of all the glorious food and shopping in TW, I am now struck by wanderlust!! Hahahaha! Legs itching now man. See already so very the hungry. Haha. Hugs girl. Glad you had fun and came home with a significant other :D You deserve happiness, truly in every sense! Now I wanna go to TW too! And my mom has been chionging Da Chang Jin yeaaaaaa, I wanna go to Korea too! All the food!!! really wonder how the taiwanese girls stay so slim and petite with all that food man!
*and there I went again and totally forgot about this entry =.="*
So yes, as I was saying.. Food. Yes, good food. Nevermind. Spacing off again. Treebark just showed me a picture of a cake he baked... making my hands itchy.. HAHAHAHA. Not that I have a talent for such thngs (I hink I have them, just that I haven't worked towards that direction yet :p)
So yeah, anyways, continuing from the last post.. so yea, I was talking to two of my close friends and we touched on topics on love and relationship. And a few things came to my mind.. Such as how easy it is to get over a person, but how hard it is to get over the feelings you once felt for that person. It became not a question of that person itself but that feelings that existed within you. Doesn't matter who that person, is, it can be easily replaced by another, but what you feel at that point of time is what cannot be replaced, and something that cannot be forgotten easily. It's the way you felt at that point in time, who you felt for is not important, just a fragment of your memory, but how you felt, the things you did for a person, the extent you go to, that makes it hard to forget. Time heals all wounds? Not really. Healing don't exist. Time only takes away memories of that person in question. Takes away that familiarity, and those images of that person, but it can never erase things that were inside you. That butterflies in your tummy feeling, that feelings of love that came within you.
I think many of you must be thinking "Wah she must be thinking about Andy again.." but in actual fact, nope I am not. You can only be a fool once and I'm very lucky that I don't have any reason to miss him. It helps that none of my friends are impressed by him so it makes forgetting him a whole lot easier. Oh yea, I'm done and over with! But my worries doesnt' stop just there.. I wonder if I can ever put myself and lower myself like I did. I wonder if I can ever sacrifice so much for another human being. I wonder if I can ever swallow my pride and rough myself up for a person.. I probably can't and I probably don't ever want to.. With that in mind, would I be shortchanging the next person? Would I not be giving enough to the next person? Would I even deserve the next person? I worry I can't meet the next person's expectations. I worry that I'm already spent and have nothing else to offer as a person. I worry I cannot be able to deliver that same expectations.
Took a break in between blogging and chatted with Zack for a while. Those two lovebirds crib are going to be up soon! So happy for him! So very the exciting! Hehehe, really hope one day I'll be as blissful as them! Also chatted about some other topics.. And all I want to say here is that I feel terrible sorry for him.. He has screwed up once again but I guess that's his life and he can do whatever he wants to it. You can't buy love or devotion through marriage. You can't buy feelings of security and most importantly, happiness using it. Maybe someday he will learn that lesson well and remember it.. just maybe someday.
Oh a trivial note, I was surfing the forums and some info and I only realised today that duck is white meat! Hahaha. Yes I am slow. Oh well~
Was also trolling some forum and read an interesting thread talking about sugar daddies. Makes us girls sound like complete materialistic fools huh ;) Actually to be honest, which girl doesn't want to be pampered and provided for? I'm not too keen on the idea of trading your body for his moolah but maybe those girls may have gone through tough relationships that made them think twice about love. Maybe it's just the money. But whatever it is, love ain't easy. Everyone knows it. Money in relationships complicates things as well. We aren't materialistic as per say, we are just being realistic. Some time ago, I was one of those fools who thought love was everything. Love or bread? I picked love. I thought love was the damn greatest thing alive and it could keep everything alive. True? Completely false and completely ridiculous. Saving your pennies for his food. Shelling out money for his groceries. Paying for his indulgences. Buying things he want but can't afford. Being the provider. Initially it feels ok, but as time passes by, you would feel damn lousy. Does it mean you are materialistic? No. Only realistic. How would you feel if you had to spend every penny on that person? How would you feel if you had to stop buying all your favourite things just so you could spend on the other person? Paying for his travel fares and taxi rides? Small sacrifice in the name of love? Total bullcrap :) Yes, I am materialistic and I am as materialistic as I am traditional. I don't need jewelleries or posh restaurant trips. But shouldnt the man be more of the provider? In chinese, a man who depends on a woman is called chi ruan fan. Meaning: eat soft rice. I've been through them all and I can tell you honestly you definitely won't feel like a million bucks. But at least I learnt them all. And with that, I shall never ever provide for another man ever again. I shouldn't be a provider, ever. Materialistic? I don't deny being that, so bite me :D Not saying that I don't want to pay my own share, that I would, but paying for another guy's share is totally nono unless I am giving a treat. Treat me like a lady and you will find yourself treated like a man. It's as simple as that.
Sometimes I wonder if I had nothing in my name to offer to you, would it still be ok? Would I still be that same wonderful person to you? Or would I be flawed and not nearly perfect enough?
*and there I went again and totally forgot about this entry =.="*
So yes, as I was saying.. Food. Yes, good food. Nevermind. Spacing off again. Treebark just showed me a picture of a cake he baked... making my hands itchy.. HAHAHAHA. Not that I have a talent for such thngs (I hink I have them, just that I haven't worked towards that direction yet :p)
So yeah, anyways, continuing from the last post.. so yea, I was talking to two of my close friends and we touched on topics on love and relationship. And a few things came to my mind.. Such as how easy it is to get over a person, but how hard it is to get over the feelings you once felt for that person. It became not a question of that person itself but that feelings that existed within you. Doesn't matter who that person, is, it can be easily replaced by another, but what you feel at that point of time is what cannot be replaced, and something that cannot be forgotten easily. It's the way you felt at that point in time, who you felt for is not important, just a fragment of your memory, but how you felt, the things you did for a person, the extent you go to, that makes it hard to forget. Time heals all wounds? Not really. Healing don't exist. Time only takes away memories of that person in question. Takes away that familiarity, and those images of that person, but it can never erase things that were inside you. That butterflies in your tummy feeling, that feelings of love that came within you.
I think many of you must be thinking "Wah she must be thinking about Andy again.." but in actual fact, nope I am not. You can only be a fool once and I'm very lucky that I don't have any reason to miss him. It helps that none of my friends are impressed by him so it makes forgetting him a whole lot easier. Oh yea, I'm done and over with! But my worries doesnt' stop just there.. I wonder if I can ever put myself and lower myself like I did. I wonder if I can ever sacrifice so much for another human being. I wonder if I can ever swallow my pride and rough myself up for a person.. I probably can't and I probably don't ever want to.. With that in mind, would I be shortchanging the next person? Would I not be giving enough to the next person? Would I even deserve the next person? I worry I can't meet the next person's expectations. I worry that I'm already spent and have nothing else to offer as a person. I worry I cannot be able to deliver that same expectations.
Took a break in between blogging and chatted with Zack for a while. Those two lovebirds crib are going to be up soon! So happy for him! So very the exciting! Hehehe, really hope one day I'll be as blissful as them! Also chatted about some other topics.. And all I want to say here is that I feel terrible sorry for him.. He has screwed up once again but I guess that's his life and he can do whatever he wants to it. You can't buy love or devotion through marriage. You can't buy feelings of security and most importantly, happiness using it. Maybe someday he will learn that lesson well and remember it.. just maybe someday.
Oh a trivial note, I was surfing the forums and some info and I only realised today that duck is white meat! Hahaha. Yes I am slow. Oh well~
Was also trolling some forum and read an interesting thread talking about sugar daddies. Makes us girls sound like complete materialistic fools huh ;) Actually to be honest, which girl doesn't want to be pampered and provided for? I'm not too keen on the idea of trading your body for his moolah but maybe those girls may have gone through tough relationships that made them think twice about love. Maybe it's just the money. But whatever it is, love ain't easy. Everyone knows it. Money in relationships complicates things as well. We aren't materialistic as per say, we are just being realistic. Some time ago, I was one of those fools who thought love was everything. Love or bread? I picked love. I thought love was the damn greatest thing alive and it could keep everything alive. True? Completely false and completely ridiculous. Saving your pennies for his food. Shelling out money for his groceries. Paying for his indulgences. Buying things he want but can't afford. Being the provider. Initially it feels ok, but as time passes by, you would feel damn lousy. Does it mean you are materialistic? No. Only realistic. How would you feel if you had to spend every penny on that person? How would you feel if you had to stop buying all your favourite things just so you could spend on the other person? Paying for his travel fares and taxi rides? Small sacrifice in the name of love? Total bullcrap :) Yes, I am materialistic and I am as materialistic as I am traditional. I don't need jewelleries or posh restaurant trips. But shouldnt the man be more of the provider? In chinese, a man who depends on a woman is called chi ruan fan. Meaning: eat soft rice. I've been through them all and I can tell you honestly you definitely won't feel like a million bucks. But at least I learnt them all. And with that, I shall never ever provide for another man ever again. I shouldn't be a provider, ever. Materialistic? I don't deny being that, so bite me :D Not saying that I don't want to pay my own share, that I would, but paying for another guy's share is totally nono unless I am giving a treat. Treat me like a lady and you will find yourself treated like a man. It's as simple as that.
Sometimes I wonder if I had nothing in my name to offer to you, would it still be ok? Would I still be that same wonderful person to you? Or would I be flawed and not nearly perfect enough?
