Ahh been a while since I last updated. Nothing much has happened, except that I went to Johor last thursday. Special thanks to Leon my lovable didi and Jason who took leave just for that. You two are the absolute bestest! =D Also present were Christina and her bf. Went there to do our hair you see.. Hehehe. Quite an adventure. Too lazy to type it all out but basically long story cut short, I rebonded my hair, did highlights and did a treatment as well. So yeap, gone are the curls that rarely existed in its fully glory and hellllllooooooooooooo straight hair! Had seafood dinner as well. Dirt cheap but I must say I didn't really enjoy it as much as I should because of the hair. Was way too concious about the oil and the smell of the place since I wasn't going to be able to wash it for 3 days. Come Saturday night, it drove me nuts and I decided to wash it afterall. Yes, I am weak-minded.

Finally met Andy after a week on Monday. Good to see him :) Missed him so much. Had a nice quiet dinner at home. Really nice to just spend time alone together. Wished we could do that more often sometimes. Everyone's been busy and all that.

Caught Bridget Jones today. Oh man, I love that show. So funny and yet, so true. I feel like her sometimes. Haha. Rebecca is someone, and He is Mark Darcy. Sometimes, I just feel really inferior to her. She is the perfect, beautiful, intelligent one, while of course I am the "fat", dumb, ugly duckling. Oh well not exactly fat, but you know what I mean.. he was so in love with her... these few words kept ringing in my head.. Christmas is coming. Bitter sweet feeling. Makes me nervous.. Though I know, and i hope, that I am the only person feeling this way. Zzz...

I feel nervous now. I still do.. Very nervous. Shaking a little, stomach is turning, heart is racing.

It's weird. How sometimes though you have everything, you feel like you have nothing cause of your own insecurities. You magnify problems you created out of your own imagination. You hang on to the past that you dislike that no longer exist simply because you feel you cannot fill her shoes. Never knowing her, never knowing why. You remember the sad bits that tears your heart but not realising how happy you are making someone now. How happy He is making you. How sad you feel because of the fiction you create. Nobody's perfect. She isn't either. Why be so competitive. You can never be like her, so why even try? She's good at studying, she's smart. But are you? Why aren't you trying harder? WHy are you disappointing yourself? Reminders will never work unless you do them. Everyone's watching you. Christmas is coming. And it's making me nervous. Very nervous. Makes me wonder. If things went well. Maybe that day will be another extremely special and eventful day. And maybe I'll be somewhere having fun, minus the happiness, and getting myself drunk silly. If we didn't cross each other's paths. Christmas day, 16 months. I should be estactic. For we will be spending that day with each other, not someone else. We :) Not you, not me, but we :)

Let it fade.. let it fade.. let it fade.. Time heals all wounds. It healed yours? Time will heal mine too.. Patience patience.. I have to be patient.. I have to try..