To the woman I most love, respect and admire.
Happy Birthday Mummy. Another year added to your age and another year less left for us to be together. When I was younger, I always thought you will be always around. To always hold my hand, to give me plenty of hugs and constant reassurance that you love me and that I am your xin gan bao bei. To have you to greet me Good Morning Darling! every morning when I wake up to wash up for school up to today!
Now that I am older, and with age catching up on me, I too realise that age is catching up with you. But, your spirit remained the same as it was 10, 20 years ago. That smile of yours, that laughter, that teasing never changed. Your heart never aged a single bit. This is what kor and I loved about you. Your spirit. Always cheerful, always loving. When you found out kor smoked, you didn't scold. You nagged in a humorous way that made us laugh. Telling him to save more for cancer treatments. Haha. You kept our secrets from Daddy, gently reminding us to stop certain bad behaviour. And ending the nag by calling me a 'naughty girl' after that.
You taught us to learn that happiness is the most important thing one should be after. You taught us to appreciate little things in life. To love all life, even that of an insect. That health and happiness and who we are are more important than material wealth. That we should always be nice to people until provoked. And when provoked, we should stand up for ourselves and put up a fight for things worth fighting for. You had always been spunky. I remember the many times I had wanted to switch classes from the best to the second best class just so I could be with my friends. Many parents would insist that I stay in that best class. But you did not. You called my principal and asked for a transfer, coming up with silly excuses on your own. Our plan didn't succeed but your spunk left a deep impression on me.
I remember the days when we had to visit the hospital so very often for my brain checkup. How you would always knit your brows when you see me coming out of the CTscan room with bruised wrists and bruised arms from all the needles. Like how you put up a strong front, even though your heart was aching because I had to go through so much pain. Like how you would keep saying 'poor thing' and keep soothing me and clasping my hands to make me feel better and loved. How you would always tell me that I am fine, and that it's just a checkup. Like how you cried the time the doctor said I might have a tumour growing inside my brain. Like how happy you looked when we realised the doctor was just bullshitting. Like how we badmouthed the doctor on our way home. Tsk tsk.
You always had a funny take when talking to me about the birds and the bees. Telling me that abortion is evil and that puppy love are meant for puppies. I always felt very paiseh but you always pressed on, making sure that all the information gets processed in my thick skull. Times like those, upon hearing your little 'speech', I get confused as to whether to roll over in laughter and amusement or to cower in embarrassment.
I remember the day I cried and you held me when I did badly for my exams. I felt I had failed you but you reassured me that I didn't. That I should work harder the next time. I remember all the days you would gently remind me to study and not play too much games 'meant for boys'. That's how you are Mummy. Always gentle and loving. You have never scolded me in a harsh tone before. Naggings were always humorous and sometimes, mean. But always meant to make me smile, never meant to make me cry. You are always kind so us. I remember the time when Xiao Yee joked that you were fierce to her. But that is a side I never knew, and will never know, because to us, you are the most loving person in the world.
Not too long ago, you were there for me to ease my pain. To forgive me and to give me your blessings. To teach me about love, about patience, about courage, about acceptance. To give and take, to trust, to have faith. You gave me strength and confidence. Thank you for slowly accepting Andy. For savouring the cake we baked for you. For repeatly telling me it's delicious and that Andy is very nice to have done that. It made me really glad.
Just yesterday, after yoga, I was amused when you held my hand and kissed it and lamented that I was getting thinner by the day and how you have great plans to fatten me up after my exams. I was deeply grateful and although all I did was to hold your hand tightly, your words meant a lot to me.
Soon, I will be embarking onto a new chapter in my life and I cannot wait to provide the best for you. Just like how you've given me your best. I don't know how much time there will be left for us to be with each other. And if I may, I would put it as infinity. It scares me every time to realise that at the end of the day, I would lose you. But starting today, I would cherish every single moment we have. I thank God for giving me the best mother any child can wish for. Thank you Mummy, for loving me so abundantly and for all the hugs and kisses even at 23!
Happy Birthday Mummy. I love you.
Happy Birthday Mummy. Another year added to your age and another year less left for us to be together. When I was younger, I always thought you will be always around. To always hold my hand, to give me plenty of hugs and constant reassurance that you love me and that I am your xin gan bao bei. To have you to greet me Good Morning Darling! every morning when I wake up to wash up for school up to today!
Now that I am older, and with age catching up on me, I too realise that age is catching up with you. But, your spirit remained the same as it was 10, 20 years ago. That smile of yours, that laughter, that teasing never changed. Your heart never aged a single bit. This is what kor and I loved about you. Your spirit. Always cheerful, always loving. When you found out kor smoked, you didn't scold. You nagged in a humorous way that made us laugh. Telling him to save more for cancer treatments. Haha. You kept our secrets from Daddy, gently reminding us to stop certain bad behaviour. And ending the nag by calling me a 'naughty girl' after that.
You taught us to learn that happiness is the most important thing one should be after. You taught us to appreciate little things in life. To love all life, even that of an insect. That health and happiness and who we are are more important than material wealth. That we should always be nice to people until provoked. And when provoked, we should stand up for ourselves and put up a fight for things worth fighting for. You had always been spunky. I remember the many times I had wanted to switch classes from the best to the second best class just so I could be with my friends. Many parents would insist that I stay in that best class. But you did not. You called my principal and asked for a transfer, coming up with silly excuses on your own. Our plan didn't succeed but your spunk left a deep impression on me.
I remember the days when we had to visit the hospital so very often for my brain checkup. How you would always knit your brows when you see me coming out of the CTscan room with bruised wrists and bruised arms from all the needles. Like how you put up a strong front, even though your heart was aching because I had to go through so much pain. Like how you would keep saying 'poor thing' and keep soothing me and clasping my hands to make me feel better and loved. How you would always tell me that I am fine, and that it's just a checkup. Like how you cried the time the doctor said I might have a tumour growing inside my brain. Like how happy you looked when we realised the doctor was just bullshitting. Like how we badmouthed the doctor on our way home. Tsk tsk.
You always had a funny take when talking to me about the birds and the bees. Telling me that abortion is evil and that puppy love are meant for puppies. I always felt very paiseh but you always pressed on, making sure that all the information gets processed in my thick skull. Times like those, upon hearing your little 'speech', I get confused as to whether to roll over in laughter and amusement or to cower in embarrassment.
I remember the day I cried and you held me when I did badly for my exams. I felt I had failed you but you reassured me that I didn't. That I should work harder the next time. I remember all the days you would gently remind me to study and not play too much games 'meant for boys'. That's how you are Mummy. Always gentle and loving. You have never scolded me in a harsh tone before. Naggings were always humorous and sometimes, mean. But always meant to make me smile, never meant to make me cry. You are always kind so us. I remember the time when Xiao Yee joked that you were fierce to her. But that is a side I never knew, and will never know, because to us, you are the most loving person in the world.
Not too long ago, you were there for me to ease my pain. To forgive me and to give me your blessings. To teach me about love, about patience, about courage, about acceptance. To give and take, to trust, to have faith. You gave me strength and confidence. Thank you for slowly accepting Andy. For savouring the cake we baked for you. For repeatly telling me it's delicious and that Andy is very nice to have done that. It made me really glad.
Just yesterday, after yoga, I was amused when you held my hand and kissed it and lamented that I was getting thinner by the day and how you have great plans to fatten me up after my exams. I was deeply grateful and although all I did was to hold your hand tightly, your words meant a lot to me.
Soon, I will be embarking onto a new chapter in my life and I cannot wait to provide the best for you. Just like how you've given me your best. I don't know how much time there will be left for us to be with each other. And if I may, I would put it as infinity. It scares me every time to realise that at the end of the day, I would lose you. But starting today, I would cherish every single moment we have. I thank God for giving me the best mother any child can wish for. Thank you Mummy, for loving me so abundantly and for all the hugs and kisses even at 23!
Happy Birthday Mummy. I love you.
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