Did you know that Andy is the voice behind starhub's commercial? The one with the guy playing computer games that says "We can fight to be our own heroes." Nah, the guy isn't him, but the voice is Andy's. =D

*Beams* :)

Holy cow....... Woke up so late today. Woke up at 1030 actually but was cramping so badly I had to rest in for a bit more. And before I know it, it's 12. Crap!

Had an awful night. Cramped so hard I had difficulty falling asleep. Been a long while since I cramped this badly.. Ah! Woes of a woman. Darn.

Alrighty, that's all for today. Too little blood going to my brain. Gonna conserve some for studying. Tata!

Ah, my boy is heading home after a hard day's work. He works hard and I am so proud of him! Watched him work yesterday.. was great and interesting to see what he does for a living :) Big hugs!

So stressed up right now.. Sigh. Studied 2 chapters of Accounting and I feel like dying already. Sigh.

Anyways, saw this while I was surfing FlowerPod during my break. Andy mentioned it to me before but I am beginning to think I am something else rather than acts of service. Anyways, just to share!

The 5 Languages of Love
1. Recieving of Gifts..
It doesn't mean that you are materialistic or poor, some people just love recieving gifts. It's like saying that " I remember you when I see this, so I bought it for you." There may be people around you whose love language is this, do take note and put effort to get them a little something.. I'm sure your relationship will go a long way..

2. Quality Time..
Unlike recieving gifts, one whose love language is spending quality time is not just about getting you a present and that's it.. You will need to spend your time and effort on this person.. And quality time doesn't mean just spending time together in the same room but both of you doing different things.. It's actually delicating your time just for this person, like cooking together or perhaps piecing the jigsaw puzzle together.. If you know someone whose love language is this and you don't do anything about it, you will find that your relationship will slowly grow cold and fade away..

3. Words of Affirmation..
Say encouraging things.. Don't despise the usual " I love you " each time you say to each other before bedtime.. It can actually mean a lot to some people.. Those whose love language is this needs a lot of verbal assurance.. No point spending so much time together when it's very hard for you to say something nice to them.. They can feel insecure..

4. Acts of Service..
So, instead of saying things, now you do it.. People with this love language appreciates nice gestures.. It could be doing your wife's house chores for her for today, or just opening the car door for her, or perhaps helping her to get the glass of water she always have to drink after dinner.. These actions may be small but it tells the person how sensitive you are to his/her needs..

5. Physical Touch..
For people with this love language, no matter how much you say you care, or how many things you buy for them, none of those can be compared to a long good hug, a kiss, or a pat on the head.. Physical touch does bring people closer together, so don't take them for granted but don't abuse them as well..

***

So which are you? I am beginning to realise I am probably a combination of Physical touch and Words of Affirmation. Somehow, I am starting to see that whenever I get them, I feel like a million bucks. But when I get acts of service, I dont feel as much as I thought I might feel. Followed by perhaps Quality time, Gifts and Acts of Service. Surprisingly, acts of service ranks last for me now. Haha.

First things first, HAPPY 20th MONTH! You win :)

Had the most amazing time yesterday. Every single moment was priceless. :) Grown a lot, matured a lot. Definitely a lot happier. Glad things turned out fine. I'm happy.

Alrighty. Time for a nap. After that it's back to the books! Highly motivated so shall not waste anymore time and get my rest before the battle.

Will blog more again later with regards to Parousia Album Launch when I take a study break or something. Was awesoooome!!

Finally let the cat of out the bag today. What a major relief. Had been torn as to whether to say or not.. and I finally did today. Felt so good to be able to come clean and in a way to deliver the good news. Like taking a load off my shoulders. Feels really good.

After almost 20 months, am glad that now finally that everything is out in the open. Glad that he knows they know. Glad that my mum has been tremendously supportive and encouraging even. Learnt a great deal from her advice. I am glad I confided in her. And I am thrilled to say that I found a best friend in my mum!

Under so much stress! Aww!

Can't believe the weekend's here already. That's one week closer to my exams. Time flies! Is time really go by us in a constant manner? Things seem to be speeding up! So stress! Accounting's my first paper! Ah! Haha.

Really starting to hope my scabs would fall off soon. I am beginning to think I really look stupid. Man.. I wanna go out!

Really can't wait for my exams to be over. Then I can go shopping, gaming, enjoy without feeling guilt.

Okay. Think I should go back and study a little more before dinner. So stress. So stress. So stress.

Sigh.. Just when I was fearing for the worst, it actually has to come true! I have chicken pox!! Yesss! Run away from me! *sigh* And you know what's the funny thing? I am almost recovered already. The doctor said that I can go out whenever I feel comfortable. Can you believe this!! Ah!! All these while when I was sick, I attributed it to my cold sore.. but noooooooo... Sigh.. Now I just hope I didn't infect anyone since I was out majority of the time during that period.. Feeling so guilty right now..

Oh man.. still cannot believe that I have chickenpox and that I have totally no idea at all before this. And by the time I find out, I am already recovering. -_-! Now my mom is telling me that I *might* have had it as a kid.. she can't remember -_-!

I think I should go get some rest.. Take advantage of the situation and be the Queen in the family. Sounds good.

Ciao.

PS: Come to think of it, wow, it was uncomfortable.. me being feverish, weak, unwell, couldn't sleep well, tossing and turning cause I was aching, semi-dazed.. Wow, I really should have spoken up about my discomfort and realise I might be more than just feverish instead of wondering why I was feeling like that and all those *bites* on me. Wish I had spoken up and investigated. I am so blur. Really ought to express myself more. Oh well, lesson learnt.. At least I learnt a great deal and at least I wouldn't do it again. Oh well.. At least I learnt something.

Thankful for my friends, and my brother and parents especially..

The first time I watched my brother gesture towards his chest and tells me that he hurts seeing me like that and cried for me. Then he came to hold me close and to give me comfort.. How wonderful is the love of a brother.. My brother.. Never knew he loved me this much.. I'm glad I realised that :)

Glad that things are slowly picking up.. bit by bit..

For the first time in a long while.. I woke up before 8 am on my own...

Nope.. Still there..

Such a drag to carry on...

Only thing that grew was the pain, the hurt, the love, the longing, the fever and the bites on my face.

I should go sleep in somemore.

I miss you.. So many things I long to tell, but yet, I lack the courage to say..

Winnie and Beeyan : Thanks dears... Don't know what I would do without you girls.. meant a lot to me..


























I miss you...

My valentine :) 

Oh Happy Day!

Oh, what a wonderful day! Oh well, more like evening. Spent a gruelling afternoon with my bitter enemy, Mr Accounting. Almost drove me berserk. I was always almost there but not quite there. Always close to balancing but never totally balanced. Darn it!!! Sigh. Gonna try harder to establish good, intimate relations with Mr Accounting tomorrow.

So yup, headed down to Andy's office in the evening, he had a job to finish so followed him to the studio to wait while he worked on the job. And man, it was fascinating to watch him work, watch him do his thang, so pro! Things I cannot hear, he can hear! My ears are useless! Am glad that his working environment is nice and comfortable as well. But also learnt that his jobs can be frustrating at times. After watching him work, I realised why he's so tired after each day. All the listening to the same old tunes and the same sounds. Mentally exerting. Will definitely not take his time-off for granted now! Every single time he chose to spend with me is less rest for him! So proud of him. My boyfriend is amazing!

After that, we headed back to his place. Watched smallville. I wonder why I didn't catch up with the episodes. Lana's so cute. Watched a little AI4 and parts of CSI.. Actually I like it without the blood and gore. Think I've to get used to it. Oh man, so many things I wanna watch!!!

Oh well, alrighty, time for bed! Night everyone!

What an amazing time.. The way you tapped your fingers on my head. The way you played the guitar. That concentration was mesmerizing. The way you pulled my hair away from my face.. the way you dried those tears away when I felt so touched. The way you asked why I cried. Your tenderness. The way I lay my head on the cushion and you laid your head on mine. The way you kissed my head. Your warm embrace. The way you baby talked. The way you sang. The way you learn the song. The way you look. That bashful look.. That grin.. That laughter.. All the things I love and more... :)

Now you see it, now you don't

Sigh.. It's 11 am! Set the alarm for 9 am but found myself muting it and getting up 2 hours later. Darn! Looks like it's become a habit! Darn darn! Still feel tired mentally. So drained. Sigh. Trying to *wake* myself up for a bit before I start my day again. Yes, start the day with studying, studying and more studying. *sigh* Accounting gives me nightmares. Sigh.

Was reading a blog and tha person tells of a conversation with this gf of a guy she knew. The author of the blog has never spoken to the gf before, and well, the problem is, the guy has passed away in an accident. They are a couple of years younger than us, about 20 I reckon. The girl was obviously devastated and was confiding in the author, a total stranger when the author accidentally dialled the guy's number when she was really trying to call someone else.

I mean.. How you you cope with the loss of a loved one. Someone you assumed you would spend the rest of your life with? Life is such a cruel joke, don't you think? One day, the person may be next to you declaring his love for you and talking about your future plans, and the next, he may be lying in a box. I cannot imagine what the gf is going through now and has to go through in the days to come. I just feel so sorry for her. Doesn't help that the gf has an exam to sit for very soon. It's going to be so tough.. Sigh.

What if Life? The days and years you live on this planet until an accident/sickness hits you and decides its time to go? The days and years you spent slogging your ass like a no-lifer to get top grades, OT till the cows come home for an unappreciative boss? What is Life? It's like a test isn't it? Some people survive these little "tests" in Life, whilst some doesn't. Those who did, will live to tell the tale. Those who didn't, well, dead men don't tell tales.

Oh well, just some thought. Gonna go get ready, scan through the papers and start studying. Have a good day ahead!

ABs-olutely Chirpy Day

Just finished practising yoga and man, I love the way it makes me feel when I am all stressed up. Relaxes my mind and gives me plenty of quality time to myself. Feeling much more refreshed and in a much better mood now. Does wonders to the mind.

Oh and....

Weeeeee~ I've got tiny abs! Mu ha ha! Not very visble unless i *gek* and you jab it *really* hard. Wahahaha. Gonna try to keep this up! Weeee! I love yoga! Yoga rocks! I should be less lazy and keep up with the routine! Weee~ Abs Abs, I've got Abs! Mu ha ha!

I miss my bunny *Booooo

Okie, 10 minutes rest break up. Back to studying. Ciao!

#$%^&* He's still at the office working! #$%^&* I have no idea how he manages sometimes.. He can juggle work, school, find the time for workouts and handle a girlfriend like me! And he's doing pretty well in school! Amazing! Am so proud of him! My inspiration!!

I remember the time you held me close to you and sang this song in my ears. Never failed to bring a smile to my face and tears to my eyes whenever I think of it. I can still remember your soft voice, your warm embrace, the gentle rocking from side to side and the exact way I felt then, how touched I felt, the tears that fell... Pure bliss. I love you. :)

I could dream my life away
What would I care anyway
It'd be so fine
If you were my baby

I'd be walking ten feet tall
With your love, girl
Why should I worry at all
If you were my baby

I'd never be lonely
If you were my only love
If you were my baby

I'd take my last breath
Before I would let you go
And I promise I'd love you forever and ever
If you were my baby

We'd go walking late at night
Count the starts up in the sky
Just you and me
If you were my baby

Stop to kiss under a tree
Listen to the sound of the whispering breeze
If you were my baby

I'd never be lonely
If you were my only love
If you were my baby

I'd take my last breath
Before I would let you go
And I promise I'd love you forever and ever
If you were my baby

Oh, how wonderful life would be
If you'd give your love to me
Just to hold you endlessly
Is all I'd ever need

I'd never be lonely
If you were my only love
If you were my baby

I'd take my last breath
Before I would let you go
And I promise I'd love you forever and ever
If you were my baby
Oh, if you were my baby
If you were my baby

I am so tired now. Yesterday I felt a total of three tremors and as if it isn't enough, I had to dream about me getting caught in an earthquake. In the dream, I was in a school I think and things were just tumbling down and we had to run for our lives. I RAN LIKE A MAD WOMAN and woke up feeling tired, exhausted and drained. At least that proved a point. It has always been mind over body.

Anyway Winnie and I have always talked about how PMS gets worse as we grow older.. Why arh? I become very emotional, very sensitive, very moody, very depressed whereas she gets irritable. The huge amounts of stress gets doubled.. Doesn't help it the stress is screwing up my system.

Anyone has a remedy?

Dear Lord, did you hear my prayers?

***

PMSing again. I am under WAY TOO MUCH stress.. I'm bursting.

I need Andy. Hugs.

***

Saturday was awesome. Finally got to spend time with Andy. Had a wonderful type with his family celebrating his sister's birthday. Played games and all that. Haven't laughed that hard in a while. Good to feel connected again.. meant a lot.

I should get some sleep soon. I need to rest my state of mind. PMS is killing it. Nitey!

We started off the "love affair" with great company, great friends, and of course, plenty of food.. 

Gan dong neh...  

So excited, so excited! 

Got saboed by the crazy, super "on" waiter to carry the cake around the restaurant.. 

... and he did... 

... With great company 

...and the many rounds that sent them running to the loo... 

And that, was how we ended our love affair :) 

TGIF! Can't wait till tomorrow! Been a long long week.. Stomach's feeling weak. Feel like throwing up whatever I just ate. *Bleah*

Thing Hello is down, can't seem to work it so pictures gotta wait! Been trying for a couple of times already.

PS: Does Starhub cable switches it own channel after you switch it off? Meaning if you turn cable back on, it would go to the channel you last watched right? I didn't pay attention to mine.

Had a great tiime with the guys celebrating Hao's birthday! Was hilarious! Pigged out, laughed, shared tonnes of LAME jokes, vuew Hao's humiliation with my own eyes and watched him parade around Olio, watched two guys down so much beer, watched their faces turn red. Hilarious!! Almost died laughing. Maybe blog about it tomorrow. Wahahahaha, those memories are going to keep me tickled for a while. Wahaha.

Miss my boy... Muacks!

Happy Birthday Hao!!!! Hehehehehe! Old man liao!!! Big Hugs!

***

Got to meet Andy yesterday.. was happy. Glad to ditched some things of my own. If I'm gonna trust, need to learn to do it the full package. Was happy to see him. *hugs*

He lost weight it seems.. Hehe. Been working out :)

Deleted all the shitty posts. Things are going back to normal slowly.. Thank God for that.

PMS is always getting me into trouble.. Anyone recommend me some hormone pills or something to curb my moods? PMS got me into so much trouble last week. I wanna ditch PMS for good.

I cried whenI read the ecard from someone dear to me. Touched my heart to know what there's always someone to hold my back should I fall.

Thanks Winnie, I couldnt ask for more in a friend than who you are to me. *Hugs* Thanks for caring and for being there always for those little words of encouragement that means so much to me. Thank you for always extending that hand out to me. Thank you for those countless smileys behind your messages. Thank you for always telling me everything's gonna be better. They all mean so much to me *hugs* You're a friend I would always cherish and never want to lose. And I too, will always be there for you when you need me.

Today I learnt 2 things:
That I truly and deeply love. More than I think. That the man I love will make things right.
That I have friends whom I can count on, rain or shine. It makes me feel blessed.

What more can a girl ask for? I feel blessed..

***

The pope passed away earlier this evening.. How fragile is life. I prayed for him earlier today and I am saddened I couldn't do much. But, I am glad he did so many great compassionate things when he was still alive. What is the meaning of life? To have lived your life full of love and to have love living your life.

Starting afresh..

This time, we'll make things right.. this time we will make things work.. this time, He will be there to guide us along. This time, I know it will surely work, cause He is there to watch over us.

***

Learning to let go of the ghosts of the past.
Learning to be more secure.
Learning to let go of hurt.
Learning to let Him take the lead.
Learning to be loved in the mind and in the heart.
Learning to trust.
Learning to love and be loved.
Learning to be His child.
Learning to rely on Him.
Learning to walk His path.
Learning His words of wisdom.
Learning to be loved by him, and more importantly, Him.

This time, we will make things work.
Renewed confidence. I love you, so much.. and everything will be better :)

You love me and I love you. And that is all that matter. Our love for each other will be the force that will bring us closer to each other. Never apart. *hugs* I will be true to my promise. And I believe you would too.

***

Thanks Winnie for being there for me. It touched my heart that I can also rely on you for support. Thanks to Bee Yan too for always being such a pillar. And everyone else who were concerned.

Daniel Bedingfield - If You Are Not The One

If you’re not the one then why does my soul feel glad today?
If you’re not the one then why does my hand fit yours this way?
If you are not mine then why does your heart return my call
If you are not mine would I have the strength to stand at all

I never know what the future brings
But I know you are here with me now
We’ll make it through
And I hope you are the one I share my life with

I don’t want to run away but I can’t take it, I don’t understand
If I’m not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am?
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?

If I don’t need you then why am I crying on my bed?
If I don’t need you then why does your name resound in my head?
If you’re not for me then why does this distance maim my life?
If you’re not for me then why do I dream of you as my wife?

I don’t know why you’re so far away
But I know that this much is true
We’ll make it through

And I hope you are the one I share my life with
And I wish that you could be the one I die with
And I pray in you’re the one I build my home with
I hope I love you all my life

I don’t want to run away but I can’t take it, I don’t understand
If I’m not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?

‘Cause I miss you, body and soul so strong that it takes my breath away
And I breathe you into my heart and pray for the strength to stand today
‘Cause I love you, whether it’s wrong or right
And though I can’t be with you tonight
And know my heart is by your side

I don’t want to run away but I can’t take it, I don’t understand
If I’m not made for you then why does my heart tell me that
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?